If we’re being honest, I had another post planned for today. It was about my obsession with vitamin c serum, and basically why I think y’all need to hop on that bandwagon ASAP (trust me, you do). When I sat down the other night to write that post though, it didn’t feel right. I didn’t want to write about vitamin c serum, because in truth, it couldn’t have been farther from my mind. Nope, instead I was lying in bed fixating on social media — my fear of missing out (or FOMO), at an all time high. While I’m sure you’ve heard this buzzy term on the internet and in the media, what does FOMO mean in 2018? How does it affect our self worth? And most importantly, what can we do to stop it?
THAT’S what was on my mind the other night, and THAT’S what we’re tapping into today.
What does FOMO mean?
Like I said, most of us have heard the term before. The fear of missing out isn’t some entirely new concept, after all. You might have felt it while getting recapped on your best friend’s new super hot boyfriend, or your cousin’s epic tour of Europe last month. Pre social media, these instances still occurred. That being said, they weren’t in your face and at your fingertips with the press of a button 24/7. They were a simple conversation at a party or lunch, and a fleeting moment when you wondered why you weren’t that girl.
After that moment though? Life resumed as normal.
The thing about FOMO in 2018 though? It isn’t just the fear of missing out on an experience. It’s the fear of missing out on an entire life. It’s the fear of missing out on being a person that you might just not be cut out to be.
And like I said…it’s 24/7.
When I started blogging in 2014, social media was an escape. It was a place to connect with people and share my thoughts and ideas with the world. It’s not to say that those things aren’t still possible four years later, but I think anyone who’s been in the game for a minute can see the shift.
This is something that has caused me a great deal of stress over the past few months. I’ve seen a lot of people speaking out about perfectionism and curation on Instagram lately, and I start to wonder…am I part of the epidemic? Do people experience FOMO from looking at my photos?
Some people probably don’t give a sh*t. It’s fun to showcase the glamorous side of life, and to tell a compelling story. I’m guilty of it too, and yet I’m still not sure there’s anything to really feel guilty for. That being said, I’m not really here for it. My goal is always inspiration, not aspiration. I want to inspire you to forge your own path, try new things, and be who you are. Of course, I want to share with you the things I love in the hopes that you’ll love them too…
But more than anything, I want to inspire.
That’s why today I’m sharing 10 of my top tips for getting rid of FOMO for good.
1. Practice the “30 Minute Rule”
Here’s an idea. Don’t go on social media for the first 30 minutes you’re awake, or the last 30 minutes before you go to bed. Meditate, read a book, journal, do something other than going on Instagram (or any other social media platform). Take time for yourself, and clear you mind.
Try to remember what life was like before social media. What things did you enjoy doing during your downtime? We often hop on Instagram or Snapchat when we’re bored, or immediately when we wake up in the morning. How about finding a new go-to, and creating a healthier ritual for when we’re bored?
2. Hit Unfollow
I used to feel bad about unfollowing people.
Will they take it personally? What if they think I hate them?
Honestly, people unfollow me every day. It’s part of being a blogger and being on social media. Do you, and unfollow anyone who’s content isn’t actually providing value and/or inspiration in your life anymore. You don’t need to pick apart why a certain influencer’s content makes you feel inadequate or gives you FOMO. Just hit unfollow and forget about it. Find accounts that make you better, not bitter!
3. Schedule Your Posts
You know the drill. You go on Instagram to post a new photo, and suddenly you’ve fallen down the rabbit hole. You end up scrolling endlessly — and aimlessly. Download an app like UNUM or Planoly, and pre-schedule your posts. Not only will this help you design a cohesive feed, but it will save you time and prevent that mindless scrolling that goes with pretty much just opening the app.
4. Have a Friend Run Your Account
Think it’s lame if you have a friend or assistant run your Insta for you? According to this article from Elle, Selena Gomez does it…
So, as you may have guessed, I’m all ears.
Basically, if you find yourself getting bummed out on social media more often than you find yourself being entertained and uplifted, it may be time to hire an assistant or enlist a friend to help you manage your accounts. It’s one of the most surefire ways to eliminate the stress to post and the temptation to scroll.
5. Play Around With Stories
Though Instagram has become one of my least favorite platforms over the past year, I do really enjoy creating Instagram stories. Unlike curated feeds, they’re a great real time, unfiltered look at people’s lives. There are definitely people who plan their stories in advance, but my favorites are always those which are filmed on the fly. We need more raw, real life content in the influencer industry — if you ask me, that is.
6. Look to Other Platforms
I know that throughout this post I’ve mostly been mentioning Instagram. That’s mainly because it’s the platform that I’ve been hearing the most complaints about lately, and the one that I think is connected with FOMO the most. Though other platforms certainly have the ability to invoke FOMO as well, I find that switching platforms really helps me nix any FOMO in the bud.
Right now, I’m kind of feeling a Twitter revival. I was looking at my stats the other day and realized that this platform actually shows my posts to a majority of my followers (unlike Instagram)…as a blogger, I want to be where the people are and where I can actually get my content noticed! It also doesn’t hurt that there’s no curated feeds to compare yourself to here.
Find a platform that makes you happy and inspires you, and stick with it!
7. Remember Social Media is a Highlight Reel
It’s so easy to forget the truth about social media in 2018. And that truth is, that it’s just a highlight reel. Some users may be more authentic and real with their followings than others, but more often than not we choose to post the best, most interesting, and exciting things that happen to us.
There’s nothing wrong with curating a feed of your favorite moments, but you have to remember that this is what 99% of the people you follow are doing too. Don’t get stressed or let your FOMO get the best of you just because you scrolled past a photo of your favorite blogger vacationing in Lake Cuomo.
She’s probably not posting the behind the scenes work she’s doing (trust me, there’s a lot!), or any of the things that might currently be stressing her out. People have private lives, and sometimes it’s easier to just share the highlight reel rather than the rough times.
I’m not saying that I think this is entirely right in 2018, but it’s a truth we would all do well to remember!
8. Think Outside the Box
My favorite people to follow on social media are the ones who actually share their “real” lives. Whether it be the behind the scenes work in creating content, real talk about the struggles their facing, or just funny moments throughout their day, that’s what I’m gravitating towards nowadays.
I’m bored of the picture perfect all the time, and I’d like to focus on shifting my own content in the coming months to reflect more of my real life as well. It’s definitely something to consider if you’re frustrated with the pressure to be perfect, too.
9. Stop Taking Yourself So Seriously!
Last but not least, can we just address what a first world problem FOMO is? There are people in the world who don’t even have access to clean water, let alone the internet. They’re not sitting around wishing they were on vacation or at fashion week, but they’re struggling to make ends meet and stay alive.
The fear of missing out is definitely real in this Instagram age and I am in no way shaming anyone who’s ever felt it — I do all the time, too! That being said, it’s important to get outside of your own bubble and stop taking everything so seriously.
Do you ever feel that there’s a pressure to be perfect that comes from social media? What does FOMO mean to you? If we can talk about it, I feel like we can fix it!
